The following was sent to the Wrestling thread by current WWE World Heavyweight Champion Seth Rollins, who wanted to tell you all about his home state. These are his words, not ours.
![seth-rollins1.jpg]()
Hello internet. It's me, your reigning and defending WWE World Heavyweight Champion, Seth Rollins, and I wanted to take this time to talk about something that's near and dear to my heart: my home state of Iowa. You see, there are a lot of people who don't know anything about Iowa, and I wanted to let those people know exactly why this is the greatest state in the world.
Wait, did I say greatest? I'm sorry, I meant the worst state.
Let's start with their flag:
![go-iowa-awesome_design.0_standard_352.0.png]()
Ok, that's not really their flag, but it gives you an idea of the terrible people we're dealing with here. These idiots think this is art. And, to be fair, that is the best drawing to come out of Iowa in decades.
Iowa is known for their corn, and if you're wondering how unoriginal and awful this state is, they had to steal the whole corn thing from Nebraska. Honestly, I'm starting to wonder how I even managed to survive here for so long.
This state is so bad that they made working for Ian Rotten seem like a step up.
You know what you do for fun in Iowa? You go outside your house and stare at this for hours:
![214415.JPG]()
Do you see how mind-numbingly boring this is? And these people do this for fun. They brag about it.
Do you even know any famous Iowans? No seriously, go ahead and try. You know who the most famous person from Iowa is? Tom Arnold. These people deserve their shame.
Wait, I take it back. Because there's a new most famous person from Iowa, and it's me. After all, who else from Iowa can claim to have done this:
![image]()
I heard they held a ticker tape parade in my honor the next day. As they should because with me as champion, Iowa suddenly has credibility. They suddenly have someone they can point to and say with pride, "Look, that man is from Iowa, and is proof that we aren't the absolute worst. Take that, you South Dakotan!" Finally Iowans can hold their head high as I lead them into a new golden age of respectability.
Or.....that would be the case, if I wanted to still pretend I care about Iowa. But why should I? I'm the WWE World Heavyweight Champion. Iowa doesn't deserve me. Iowa doesn't deserve...this.
![seth-rollins-wwe-world-heavyweight-champion-photo-from-wwe-website.jpg]()
Hello internet. It's me, your reigning and defending WWE World Heavyweight Champion, Seth Rollins, and I wanted to take this time to talk about something that's near and dear to my heart: my home state of Iowa. You see, there are a lot of people who don't know anything about Iowa, and I wanted to let those people know exactly why this is the greatest state in the world.
Wait, did I say greatest? I'm sorry, I meant the worst state.
Let's start with their flag:
Ok, that's not really their flag, but it gives you an idea of the terrible people we're dealing with here. These idiots think this is art. And, to be fair, that is the best drawing to come out of Iowa in decades.
Iowa is known for their corn, and if you're wondering how unoriginal and awful this state is, they had to steal the whole corn thing from Nebraska. Honestly, I'm starting to wonder how I even managed to survive here for so long.
This state is so bad that they made working for Ian Rotten seem like a step up.
You know what you do for fun in Iowa? You go outside your house and stare at this for hours:
Do you see how mind-numbingly boring this is? And these people do this for fun. They brag about it.
Do you even know any famous Iowans? No seriously, go ahead and try. You know who the most famous person from Iowa is? Tom Arnold. These people deserve their shame.
Wait, I take it back. Because there's a new most famous person from Iowa, and it's me. After all, who else from Iowa can claim to have done this:
I heard they held a ticker tape parade in my honor the next day. As they should because with me as champion, Iowa suddenly has credibility. They suddenly have someone they can point to and say with pride, "Look, that man is from Iowa, and is proof that we aren't the absolute worst. Take that, you South Dakotan!" Finally Iowans can hold their head high as I lead them into a new golden age of respectability.
Or.....that would be the case, if I wanted to still pretend I care about Iowa. But why should I? I'm the WWE World Heavyweight Champion. Iowa doesn't deserve me. Iowa doesn't deserve...this.
