An SE++ [Phalla]mas - Moderator (Mafia) Victory

There was a time, spoken of only in whispers, when the forums were different. Of course, it is blasphemy to speak of this, but I think that it’s important you know. There were heroes that walked among us then, men and women who posted with divine righteousness. They say that there are some among us still, although we see them not.

In those days, the forums rang with the blows of theorycrafters and fanartists alike. You could take no more than two steps before a “bro?” came your way. It is said that nobody had even heard of an anime thread. I will tell you a tale of that golden age. It is a good story, I think. It is a story of love, of betrayal, of mods and men clashing in a desperate struggle.

I will tell you of SE++ Christmas 2013.

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This is a phalla. A phalla is the PA forum version of the game mafia. Critical Failures has a good summary of the basic mechanics for a phalla game here if you are unfamiliar with the game. The premise is an uninformed majority (the village) must seek out and eliminate an informed minority (the mafia) hiding amongst them. I, @Baidol, will be your host this game with @SirFabulous as my co-host and writer. This particular phalla is of the traditional variety: village vs. mafia. Roles are traditional (vig, seer, guard, but no thralls, etc.) This game has a player cap of 70. Signups for this game will continue until at 8:00 pm PST Monday, November 4, or until all positions are filled. The game will begin sometime on Monday, November 4 and will end on Tuesday, November 5, resulting in a long Day 1. Roles will go out shortly before 10:00 pm PST with the game's opening narration going up at 10:00pm PST. This will result in a normal length Day 1.

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“It-It’s finally done.” Tube looked at his greatest creation with pride. His cold, black heart swelled with joy, and some say that it grew three sizes that day. Uncaring of the relative size of his heart, Tube allowed himself a sob of relief. It had taken years of hard labour, but it looked like everything was worth it. “Finally, the forums will be filled with holiday cheer. With your help, I can rule the forums, alone, with an iron fist. No longer will those independent thinking fools stand in my way. The dawn of the Tube age is here!”

As he spoke these final words, Tube strode up to his dazzling, chrome creation and, holding a piece of mistletoe above them both, firmly planted a sloppy kiss upon the shiny, hardened chassis. There was no need to fear, nothing would disturb them in the sanctity of Tube’s home. They could get away with anything.

The door slammed open and light streamed into the darkened laboratory. “No! No, there was time now!” Howled Tube as he whirled to face his intruders. “You silly geese! I am so, so close! If you had waited for just a few days more!”

“I’m afraid we can’t let that happen Tube,” spoke Larlar. “We’ve had it. With you. With Geth. With whatever it is you’re working on now. We will not allow these forums to be turned into a despotic perversions of holiday cheer.” Tube turned and observed his creations for the last time. So many dreams unfulfilled. So many animes left unwatched. So many forumers wallowing in ignorance. It was time to go out with a bang.

As the bullets tore through his body, Tube started to smile. When his knees finally collapsed, and his vision went hazy, he started to laugh. With a final, piteous breath, Tube spoke. “I knew this day was coming. Upon my death, the failsafe procedures will be activated. You have not won. My glorious edict will remain… in… perpetuity.”

As the light finally left his eyes, a low whine filled the air. Electricity crackled across the walls, and the whine slowly rose in pitch. “Let’s get out of here, guys!” Rorus Raz swore, wetting himself slightly.

And so it began.

The Dead

Tube - Administrator: Insurrection

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You blink your eyes against the harsh forum sun. It’s been tough work these past few weeks. You used to think that the death of Tube would be the greatest blessing this forum could ever know, but it has turned out to be a horrible curse. With Tube gone, your robotic overlords have free reign over the land.

It’s almost enough to make you want to rebel. You had better not though. Rumor states that if the general population becomes too unruly, the forums will be shut down forever. If that happened, how would you ever obsessively check how many “awesomes” you had? Without awesomes, does life have a purpose?

And so you go on, living your life day by day, trying to do nothing to displease your masters. It would all be so much easier without the moderators. Although many were wiped out, you hear that some still remain. You have no idea what their goal is, but you will literally kill a man before you let these forums fade into history.

Fortunately, the holiday season is fast approaching and your robot overlords at least make the place look nice while they whip you into submission. Even now, the Ministry of Cheer that looms over all of the forums is being bedecked in lights and -

Suddenly, a claxon sounds from the Ministry and a voice is heard over the intercom, “This is Robot Santa Prime. Intelligence has revealed that the remnants of the Moderator insurrection have regrouped in SE++. Until further notice, SE++ is on lockdown. All posters are ordered to register at the Ministry of Cheer and begin eliminating the insurrectionists.”

“Holiday Fear forces have been deployed to SE++ to aid you. Collateral damage is expected. Do not fail us.”

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Please remember that, by signing up for this game, you are agreeing to abide by the rules of the game.

!Sign up in boldlimegreen. If you are unsure about your ability to commit to the game or signups are full, you may sign up as a reserve by posting !Reserve.

Upon signing up, in accordance with lockdown protocols, you must also register on the Ministry of Cheer proboards with your PA forum name. Your Minicheer account authorization will be placed on hold until the game begins.

As a member of the forum community, you must decide which MiniCheer room those suspected of lacking Christmas cheer will sweat in by voting in !boldcyan before the opening narration. Your options are Room 101, Room 202 or Room 303. The cyan vote has no effect on the mechanics of the game, only which RNG list is used to assign roles.

Clarifications may be asked in this thread in !bolddarkorange and will be collected in the second post of this thread.

All players must post twice a day, including a vote post for a player to be lynched, designated in !boldred. Retraction posts can be made in !boldlimegreen, but are not required. The last !boldred vote post from a given user will be the one that is counted. Do. Not. Edit. Vote. Posts. Period. For. Any. Reason. Fullstop. Dot. Votes in an edited post will not be counted. To aid me in counting votes, please place your votes on a separate line at the beginning or end of your post, and not buried in the middle of a paragraph.

Standard phalla rules apply. This includes, but is not limited to, no copying/pasting, taking screenshots, taking pictures of and e-mailing or anything else of role PM’s.

Communication of any kind between live players and dead players is forbidden. Additionally, dead players may not communicate with other dead players. A single death post containing no in-game information is allowed. Additionally, after death, players may not like/awesome/bro posts made in the game.

I must have administrator access to any proboards created. Please also add me and @SirFabulous to any PM conversations you have with other players. As a reminder, trust and truth are valuable commodities in phalla. As such, if you wish to bring a new person into a conversation you are already participating in, you MUST begin a new conversation. You cannot simply add them to the old one. Finally, should you be in a group conversation with a person who is killed, the remaining live members of the group must start a new conversation.

You will receive one (1) warning for inactivity before being removed and replaced. So long as replacements are available, players will be replaced, until the point of no return. If you were around for my last phalla, you know I will purge inactive mafia just as easily as inactive villagers.

If/once the player count drops below 15 players, all surviving players must vote every day. THERE WILL BE NO WARNINGS AND INACTIVES WILL BE REMOVED IMMEDIATELY AT THAT POINT AND WILL NOT BE REPLACED. Much of the late game involves analysis of voting records and that can’t happen if people don’t vote.

Voting for this phalla will close at 10:00pm PST (6:00am GMT). Only posts with a timestamp of before 10:00pm PST (6:00am GMT) i.e. 9:XX or sooner will be accepted. Special actions must be PM’ed to myself or listed on proboards by the same time. Orders put into an edited post on a proboard will not be accepted.